Okay, the first suggestion. Written by Little Miss A. Funny Stories that I have happened to have Heard.
MY FUNNY STORY:
Um...uh. Let's see... I'll just go with The True Story of The Three Little Pigs. WHICH WAS ACTUALLY WRITTEN BY JON SCIESZKA, NOT ME!!!! I just re-wrote the same thing, but shorter, and not as good.
Once upon a Time,
There was a wolf named Alexander. And he was making a cake for his grandmther. And he ran out of sugar. So the wolf went to his neighbor's house. His neighbor was a pig. And the pig's house was made of straw. So when Alexander knocked on the door, it fell down. Then Alexander started to sneeze. And the house fell down. And the pig was just lying there in the middle of all the straw, dead. So Alexander ate him up. Then, Alexander went to his other neighbor, who also happened to be a pig. Whose house was made of sticks. Alexander knocked on the door. And the pig said, " Go away wolf. You can't come in. I'm shaving the hairs on my chinny chin chin." Alexander was about to barge on in, but he sneezed and the house fell down, leaving the pig dead in the middle of it all. So he got eaten, too. Then, he went to his other neighbor's house, and his neighbor was also a pig, and his house was made of bricks. And then Alexander asked the pig for some sugar, and he said no. So Alexander was about to give up and go home, when the pig said that Alexander's grandmother could sit on a pin. Then the wolf went crazy, and was trying to break down the door, and then the cops showed up, while he was sneezing his head off. So then the reporters jazzed up the story, by adding the, "huffing and puffing." So now Alexander is in jail.
There, you have it. And remember. I did not write this, I just retold it, but worse. So, Little Miss A, was this what you had in mind? :)
Go check out The True Story of the 3 Little Pigs! By Jon Scieszka